🚗 Ford Teases "Dog Mode"

In Today’s Email:

• Pet Detection Systems: because self-driving is so 2020.

• Oiled up: 70% of Italian olive oil is in danger. One snout is saving it.

• “The Squeeze” AKA The Web’s Best dog news in 60 seconds.

• The Last Laugh: What We’re Laughing with. Not at.

Ford Unveils a “Pet Detection System” Because Why the Fluff Not?

It won’t be long before your Ford’s passenger experience centers on ideal canine conditions. The company has filed a recent patent application for a pet detection system that will monitor your pet’s status and adjust the seat and environmental conditions accordingly.

The proprietary sequence begins with a camera visualizing the pet before telling a Bluetooth-enabled controller to recline the seat for your good boy (or passenger princess). Need to hop out for a box of cous cous? Your phone will keep Fido cool with temperature control and music ambience.

But wait…there’s more. With a focus on the future of self-driving, the automaker is equipping the feature for every seat in the car so…yes…even the driver’s seat is canine-ready. Ford hasn’t been cool for a while but they’re now turning heads at the prom.

Fun Fact: The company employs two robotic “dogs” from Boston Dynamics to assist with manufacturing. They’re four-legged and named “Fluffy” (that’s not a joke).

The Next Air Bud?

Sam Breen averages 17.7 pts for the UMass Minutemen’s women’s basketball team, but all the buzz in Amherst is over her dog, Turbo. The prized pooch signed an NIL deal for “Turbo’s Treats” - basketball-shaped and modeled after the reigning A-10 Pup of the Year. But we gotta know: can real life Air Bud dunk?

Overheard at the Dog Park:

“I buried my bone. It is safe now. Wait, where’s my bone?”

- Winston, English Bulldog, Omaha, NE

Olive Trees Are in Danger. The Oil Supply Relies on One Snout.

Italy’s olive trees are under attack by a hard-to-detect disease and the country is relying on a white labrador to save the region responsible for 70% of Italy’s oil exports. Our hero is Paco, and the Joker to his Batman is Xylella fastidiosa, a type of bacterium that has been ravaging southern Italy's olive fields for the past decade.

If you’re a nerd like us, then you absolutely need to know that Xylella clogs the Xylem in the plant (the vessel that carries the water from the roots to the leaves), which…in laymen’s terms…is a fu**ing problem.

Southern Italy has over 60 million olive trees and this bacteria has annihilated over 21 million in just a few years. Paco detects the scent of a tree infected with Xylella to allow his owner to cut the tree down and prevent further spreading.

So, can we all agree we’re drinking to Paco tonight?

Make A Difference:

• Want to make yourself useful? Sign this petition that aims to eliminate doorbell ringing on television. It has 12 signatures but movements need to start somewhere, Debra.

“The Squeeze” aka Dog News in 60 Seconds

• 👃 It was cool learning dogs can smell stress, until a recent study proved that ants can smell cancer.

• 🛡️ LA’s elite are forking over $150,000 for canine home defense systems. Think twice before scaling Beyonce’s fence.

• ⛳ English golf courses are lauding Marlo, a Cavapoo responsible for retrieving over 6,000 lost golf balls and donating them to local charities so that underprivileged children can learn to golf. So, don’t sweat that next shank.

• 💩 The Louisville Men’s Basketball team is dogs**t (we’re not offending anyone. Their 4-26 record is). Their halftime act let them know. Spoiler alert: it’s 💩.

• 📖 Dictionary.com has added over 300 new words to keep up with an “ever-changing English language,” including “petfluencer.”

• 🗞️ Prince is blind, but it doesn’t stop him from doing his job every morning, retrieving the newspaper at the end of the driveway for his owner, so if you’re reading this in bed, get up. Prince is already on the move and he can’t see.

• 🤌 San Francisco’s hottest reservation? A $75 chef’s tasting menu…for dogs. Eat your heart out.

And finally, today’s Last Laugh…

This Bruce Lee Shiba Inu was clearly raised in the house of Miyagi. We’re hearing his lethal toe beans are wanted for assault in 36 states.